Dopamine menu

If anyone ask me what my best investment in life is, it comes down to this : My camera, my kindle, my health, my relationships, and my education. My recent re-read of Ikigai made me realize the art of intentional living and investing on doing what fulfils you. More than that it made me appreciate just how lucky I am to already know my passion.

 All of my friends know I have this love for photography and cinematography since elementary. I dont do it for money or recognition, it doesnt even really matter if it gets views or not - its simply one of the activities that make me lose track of time and deeply ignite this sense of purpose to my life. I guess my love for documentation applies to this blog too. I dont really know why I blog, I just know I enjoy it and i feel it forces me to be grammatically smarter.

My kindle is another investment that I always recommend to my friends. I know reading isnt everyone's go-to way to unwind.. but reading is so underrated . Unlike doom scrolling or binge-watching, it slows you down. It helps me sleep and wind down at night. You learn without even trying. You get to escape life for a while. It makes you emotionally smarter. It makes you a more interesting human and its cheaper than therapy. 

Investing on health, relationships and education goes without saying. It is something that I am still working on (especially health-wise) but I am not rushing the process. After all, this is not a quick fix but a lifetime shift. 

My goal is to create this natural, sustainable flow of life, much like the essence of ikigai 

On a completely unrelated note here is a list of my current dopamine menu :

1. Going to bed early with a good series ready ( Current watch : We were liars)

2. Matcha 

3. Weekly Pilates session

4. Friends recommending me new thrillers for my kindle

5. Exciting montessori lesson plans for the month 

6. When your purchased vitamins finally arrived in the mail

7. Finding old phones from yearss ago and discovering you are not the same person anymore (in a good way)

8. Maison Margiela's Flower Market - LOVE anything with tuberose

Behind the veil

What the Wedding industry teaches about people .

I spent a good part of this morning swapping horror stories with a friend who is even deeper in the wedding industry. This is what triggered me to write this post, because I do have a lot of thoughts about this. On the surface, it may seem like a world of glittering gowns, tiaras, perfect flower installations and fairy tale moments - but we all know things are not always as they appear. Behind the scenes, it is a high stress environment that reveals the very core of human behavior. 

If your work coincides the wedding industry environment like me, you are exposed to all kinds of people. You get to see how differently people handle the same intense situations. It is a unique glimpse to humanity at its best and at its worst. Expectations run high, emotions are heightened. Some handle it with grace but there are others whose maintained facades begin to crack.  And this is what you learn : Stress doesnt create character - it reveals it. Its not easy to witness but it is a deeply humbling experience. Someone can appear so demure and polite until placed in a high stress environment.

As a bride myself last year who has gone through the whole wedding planning thing, I often wonder why some people pour so much effort into making everything perfect for guests - obsessing over napkin colours, seating charts, entrance songs .. honestly, what is the big deal in all of this? I dont mean putting meticulous care and detail into one of the most important day of your life. I meant crying over a small hiccup and blowing it out of proportions just because things dont go 100% the way you planned.

If things did go wrong, SO BE IT. it is what it is as long as you did your best in the planning. That is what I did.. from doing detailed research, dedicating a lot of time to go through moodboards and vendors, trusting the right organizer, putting effort into making sure the day is enjoyable for me and my husb. Then I sit back and let it all flow without expectations.

What good is a flawlessly executed ceremony if the couple themselves forgets to cultivate peace of mind, respect and unconditional love in the days that follow? The more energy we spend trying to impress others, the further we drift from inner calm and emotional connection that truly sustains a marriage. Why cant people just see this? 

After all, the best weddings are not the most extravagant, but they are the ones where love feels real, when joy is shared. 

When "I do" is not performative, but a sacred promise. 

Writing all of this down I know I might come across like a know it all or judgemental. But I dont care. These are my honest opinion on weddings and I am entitled to mine.  Not only weddings but life in general. Its frustrating  and a turn off for me to watch someone else nitpick or stress about such insignificant matter..I know everyone has their own way of dealing with things but I dont think I can be friends with people who make problems out of nothing. It is exhausting and I am thankful my friends are in the same wavelength and mentality like me. We understand some stress are simply just not worth the energy because life is already complex enough.

You choose your hard, you choose your struggles and challenges . I hope at the end of the day we pick the problems that are actually worth fighting for. Be smart enough to understand that the world does not revolve around us. 

Ending this post on a positive note because it has been exhausting to write, but Ive focused my photography work to revolve around maternity, newborn and beauty sessions.

 No more wedding industries for me, it has been a good character development process but I will just say hobbies are meant to be fulfilling, not work or a burden.

Slice of life 3

Bits from life recently 

slow saturdays

On slow saturdays ; 

no alarms, waking up for brunch, celebrating milestones, enjoying home-cooked good food, going for matcha after, going over life events together, settling down with a new read, doing grocery shopping for the week, family dinners, movie nights with husb, and turning off the lights early. 

Fresh Iced tea on a scorching hot day, at a secluded location hits different

Food also resonates differently

Had our lunch overlooking the garden 

To more slow saturdays ~
 

On wealth that money cant buy

 

The recent read that has been on my mind, exploring the philosophy behind what truly makes a well-lived life. 

Too much of a thing is good for nothing. I like to think of it as 'the art of a balanced life '  

The chapters are short, and the words are simple yet direct . I like how this is a book you can squeeze in 10 minutes a day while having your morning coffee, or like me, in the quiet time before bed. The other day I was catching up with my friends and amidst our discussion we realized how easy it is to fall into the negative cycle trap. When things are just bleak and blahs. Especially the more we grow up the smarter we get and the more we are exposed to real world problems. 

Another revelation - the more stupid you are, the more like-able, happier and care free you become. 

More than anything, I realize a positive mindset is something that we have to practice like a muscle until it becomes second nature. Anything that is worth doing is hard, and this year for me (if you cannot already tell) is all about adulting, doing the work and keeping myself accountable. 

Sometimes I wonder,  why not have school subjects on emotional intelligence? On how to be decent human beings.

If only everyone was taught how to communicate when hurt, how to set boundaries, how to build healthy relationships - the world would be a better place if only school systems are rooted in producing emotionally intelligent humans as opposed to obedient 'workers'.

Anywayssss, in his book Robin Sharma helped me shift my focus from external riches to internal wealth - purpose, peace of mind, health, self growth. I like to think that if you have a beautiful mindset, carry yourself gracefully and find your life purpose - that satisfaction lasts much much longer than buying a new bag. 

The greatest investment is in yourself and building a life that is all rounded, enriching and humbling. 

What truly matters most for an all rounded, wealthy life :

1. Growth
2. Wellness
3. Family 
4. Craft 
5. Money
6. Community 
7. Adventure 
8. Service

Slice of life part.2

Slice of life pt.1

Life lately -  challenging myself to carry my fujifilm everywhere so hopefully this is going to be me, constant with video diaries. Things change so fast in a year..these are the small moments from 'now' that I know I will reminisce in the future.