first things first, I fell in love with this music 

Throwback to when I am still functioning as a human being

Last week I mentioned about being half dead. Right at this moment I am fully mentally dead for real. University is literally killing me and making me anxious and there are nights where I just literally give up midway revision and cry lol. Late nights made my eyes partially blind now (exaggerating) and because Im trying to wean off caffeine, my main source of energy has officially changed to pinterest. Its been working so far and looking at bucketlist and travel 'pins' made university work seem insignificant in the bigger picture. I think this week Ive faced so so many challenging situations, all at the same time. My life is just kind of crazy right now, in every aspect. It kind of made me tired and want to sleep 24/7. Right now Im sort of just taking one day at a time and surprisingly doing well these days, just soooo sleepy and want to get my projects and assignments and reports and presentations done. But now (of all time!!!!) I have a fever and its not fun!

BUT!! I just sold my old textbooks two weeks ago and last week just splurged on shopping because I feel like Its justified (yes it is!) after my hard week (I deserve!!)

I fell in love with this. Ive been seeing the Fenty Beauty hype all over social media now but I wasnt aware of the lip bomb until I went to Sephora and the lady pressed the lipbomb in my hands and told me she swears by it and I need it. Firstly, it was kind of intimidating to enter a store and to be immediately pounced on like that. Secondly, I dont know if I should be offended like what do you mean. At the time I was interested in the profilter foundation but one of my weakness is saying no to people so I ended up buying the lip bomb instead but no regrets (also the lady called me gorgeous and I am easily persuaded like that)

Its a universal nude dusty rose shade with tiny glitter particles in it. 

Nars Blush in Orgasm 
This one is an impromptu buy and I had that 'what have I done' moments leaving the store because wtf did I just do but another splurge that I dont regret because the color is so so pretty and delicate and it just gives you that natural flush I guess, hence the name.
Its a pretty coraly-pink shade with gold speckles. It has a very sheer finish but very buildable

Loreal Lipstick - Velvet Rose

I showed this to a friend and she actually applauded me for going outside my usual colour range (blush nudes, mauve, pinks). I usually go for the 'my lips but better' ranges but this was another love at first swipe because the colour honestly just looks so beautiful. When applied , it is a warm red with a pink undertone. its very sheer so for me the first swipe can still pass as a my lips but better colour.

Daily current favourites
I try not to wear make up to uni because I dont want to be reliant on it, and also most of the time I go straight to gym so I dont see the point of it ( lmao tbh I just dont have anyone to impress here).
I usually go for concealer so people dont mistaken me as a panda, fill in brows, mascara and sheer gloss (I like burt's bees or maybelline baby lips). If I am looking more dead than usual I add some blush. 

More random stuff in my room

- Peony handcream from loccitane ( I like my hands to be soft and smooth)
- Hair oil ( I like my hair to be silky and smooth)
- Sheer gloss ( I like moisturised lips)
- Perfume (the perfume was described as 'pure and alluring' and I wanted to smell 'pure and alluring'.)
- Shimmer mist ( it is pink and has glitter and smells good, I dont exactly know what it is for but it is so pretty so I was sold)


On a completely unrelated note, I need Icecream!!!!!



Finally friday but the uni burn out is still on going but at least Im pretty much done with my essays, reports, and I got a good score for my philosophy midsems so today is a good day. The other day I visited 'The Rocks'!

So exotic

Treated myself to another old favourite movie 'Dear John' and I think I sort of can relate to it now

LDRs are hard
The first thing people do when I bring up my relationship back then is to tell me that LDRs are bullshit. And in a way, I guess I sort of understood what they meant - I used to be one of them lol. After all, the point of getting yourself a boyfriend is to make life easier and at the very least happy for you. Relationships are supposed to complement your life and to experience life with someone else and to grow together while learning about each other. At least that was what I had in mind, but I guess life never goes as planned haha

I said it a million times before and I’m going to say it again – long distance relationships are hard and I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy. I guess when you really, really like someone its only natural to want to spend most of your time with the other person. Being in a relationship with a 19-hour difference (not even joking) and potentially only being able to meet once a year, it makes you feel a different kind of loneliness. Its unlike anything I’ve ever felt before and I honestly never talked about this a lot because I feel like only those who had gone through the same experience could understand how it felt. Even talking and writing about it hits me with that pang of hollowness I try to avoid. People will try to empathize by saying ‘’you’ll get used to it’’ but for me that is actually the worst that could happen. I didn’t want to get used to not having my boyfriend around. What is the point of the relationship then, if we’re both fine without one another? Its hard to put it into words but ‘missing’ another person became an understatement and it just hits you randomly, and when it does it consumes you whole. It’s almost cruel to be in situations like this. I honestly have a newfound respect for couples who made it through and conquered the distance.


Week 7 of uni and I am half dead, literally. I feel like these days there is so much stuff to do I dont even have time to overthink stuff and that might be just what I need right now - lots and lots of distractions. Having one last midsem quiz tomorrow and then I will spend this weekend just chilling around because heck I deserve to just chill around after this hectic all-nighter week. 



For someone who is always cynical and passive aggressive, I sure do dress up cheerful. I look put together and happy in the picture but behind the scenes struggling with 2 essays, one report due at the same date, got out of a relationship, presentations, interviews,  3 missed lecture recordings. 
But the strange thing is I am happy, even with this busy hectic schedule

When the room wifi is so slow so you have to go to uni earlier just to watch lecture slides (and games of thrones lmao just being honest)
about the snapchat cameo lmao, the weather has blessed me with good lightning and good hair day and also I was in a particularly good mood because the banana bread I ordered was sooooo good.
You also cant tell from the picture but I was having the worst stomach and back cramp ever. I probably shouldnt have gone for iced coffee since cold drinks supposedly worsen the symptoms but I cant resist icecream

REALLY shouldnt have gone for the Iced Coffee because the cramps literally kept me up at night but oh well this girl needs some caffeine

On a completely unrelated note, Ive been craving salted egg anything but Sydney does!not!have!them!anywhere!